Tools of the Trade: Erotic Bondage Books

By Lucy Peignoir

Of all the many practical skills that are part of the BDSM repertoire, bondage may be the easiest to learn from a book. Hands-on instruction is always preferable, of course, but knot and rope work lends itself easily to simple step-by-step description and illustration on the page. So it’s no wonder that there’s a plethora of how-to bondage books out there for the beginning practitioner to choose from. But where to begin? Who’s the best, the most thorough, the most accessible?

The granddaddy of all modern erotic bondage books is Jay Wiseman’s Erotic Bondage Handbook Published in 2000, this was, at the time it was published, the definitive book on erotic bondage practices, simply because it had no other competitors. The follow-up to Wiseman’s wildly successful SM 101, this was the first book to discuss rope bondage, only rope bondage, and nothing but rope bondage.

But while The Erotic Bondage Handbook may be the elder statesman of bondage manuals, it’s not without its flaws. For example: you will have to wade through over a hundred pages of introductory material before Wiseman tells you how to tie your first knot.

Some of the material preceding the actual discussions of technique is useful: he tells you how to wash your ropes and how to store them. He discusses some of the psychological elements of an erotic bondage scene. He introduces a great deal of vocabulary – rope-tying has a lot of jargon! All of this information is useful, but a large chunk of it could have been moved to the back of the book, rather than sitting indigestibly in the front matter.

Some of the other beginning chapters concern themselves more with the author’s philosophy, history, and motivations for writing the book than with any useful information.

And then there are the pages and pages of disclaimers and warnings.

In other words, Wiseman’s manual is plodding and thorough rather than clear and concise. It’s hard to skip around, and yet for the impatient (or those who are new to bondage but not to BDSM), the temptation is almost irresistible.

Another weakness: all the illustrations here are simple line drawings. The drawings are simple and accurate, and therefore useful enough, but not particularly illuminating in terms of the finer points of technique.

A third thing to keep in mind is that this was written before Japanese-style erotic bondage became all the rage. While many newer manuals incorporate shibari techniques, Wiseman’s approach is Western-centric and organized around practicality rather than aesthetics. This can actually be refreshing – as is his defense of the humble granny knot.

This is a useful book to have around if only for its very thoroughness. If you manage to make your way through this book cover to cover, you will never lack for exciting erotic bondage ideas and techniques.

If The Erotic Bondage Handbook is the elder statesman of bondage books, Showing You The Ropes is the cheeky younger brother. The authors are the Two Knotty Boys, aka Dan and JD, a pair of playful rope bondage instructors based in the San Francisco bay Area.

The Knotty Boys keep their introductory material down to a page each: “Introduction,” “Rope Bondage Safety,” and “A Few Lines About Rope.” Then they dive right into the knots.

Dan and JD give each of thirteen knots a page full of black and white illustrations depicting exactly how to tie them. They move from simple square knots and bow ties to multi-looped snake weaves and trinity knots. The Knotty Boys blend Japanese and Western techniques in their ties, and the result has a certain hybrid vigor.

The next four sections, “Basic Bondage,” “Decorative Bondage,” “Dominance Bondage,” and “Sex Bondage,” show you how to put together those knots. The emphasis on step-by-step black-and-white photo illustration continues throughout. By the end of this surprisingly slim book, you will know how to tie a body harness, build a gag, a bra, or a dildo harness with rope. You will know how to secure someone to a table or a chair. You will be able to tie their hands behind their back or above their head. And you will do it all with style.

This is probably the best bondage book in print today. The instructions are clear and the photos are invaluable. The Knotty boys have broken down everything they do step by step. This is nothing less than a technical manual for bondage aficionados.

Another book in a similar vein is Chanta Rose’s Bondage For Sex: Volume 1. Chanta Rose is a former bondage model turned rigger. Her book is full-color and mixes glossy full-page shots of the finished product with step-by-step illustrations. Her title is deliberate: the very first sentence declares, “I believe bondage is all about sex.” Not pain, not dominance or submission, nor any of the other ways bondage can be incorporated into BDSM play. For Rose, bondage is foreplay, and if the scene doesn’t end with some form of sexual activity, what’s the point?

Although similar in style to the Knotty Boys’ book, the focus is narrower and thus, the content isn’t as thorough, even though Rose’s book is longer and filled with more photos. Rose demonstrates exactly three knots, all on a single page – the overhand, the square knot, and the lark’s head. It’s nice to let beginning bondage aficionados know that you don’t have to memorize a lot of complicated knotwork to work with rope, but this still seems skimpy.

As for the ties, as the title implies, the emphasis is on securing someone for sex. The ties emphasize sexual access and mostly revolve around a bed frame and headboards. Some of the ties depicted are rather uncomfortable-looking. Not all of us are as flexible and lithe as the bondage models depicted, alas. Yet there’s no discussion of physical limitations.

And, sadly, all the models are women. Perhaps Volume 2 will include tie-downs designed especially for men?

Nonetheless, this is a lovely and useful addition to a bondage library, especially if your main interest is in tying someone down for sex play.

If your interest leans specifically toward the Japanese style of erotic bondage, then the book for you is The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage by Midori.

Midori opens with a very valuable primer on Japanese-style bondage – what it is, what it isn’t, its history and its aesthetics. She admits that she does not consider herself a nawashi, or rope master, and she doesn’t call her style shibari, because that refers more to the very spectacular style found more in pornography than in real life. And she distinguishes between what you will see in the pretty photo books and what you can do outside the studio.

One of the nicest things about Midori’s book is her choice of models. She features both male and female figures and highlights a variety of body types in her utterly ravishing photos. Most of the instruction, however, is via line illustration. In this case, the illustrations are clear, uncluttered, and easy to follow.

She starts with simple ties and works up to more complex ones, ending with techniques incorporating bamboo poles and partial suspension. She ends each section with “options and ideas” on what to do once you’ve tied someone up.

Japanese-style bondage de-emphasizes rope work and emphasizes aesthetics. Midori makes sure the budding practitioner understands this is a living art form, not one frozen in tradition. Then she ably gives the basics so that anyone can get started tying. She transforms a style that might seem dauntingly intricate into an easily accessible form.