Illuminations: Safety first

In light of the recent events unfolding in Kansas involving, SlaveMaster, and the women who've met him, I feel that the call to once again speak about the issue of safety. It is far too important to ignore. If you are not familiar with the ‘SlaveMaster’ story, please see www.kctv.com. In today's world where so many people are meeting potential partners online, one must, and I repeat MUST, know how to keep safe while exploring potential partners or playing with others.

Never forget, either Dominant or submissive, male or female, we must not lose sight of the fact that ultimately we are responsible for our own safety. I do not know of anyone who would disagree with the idea of setting up a safety net when meeting someone for the first time. In this edition of Illuminations I will list suggestions for anyone, Dominant or submissive, to utilize if and when you decide to take your interaction from IRC, or email encounters, face to face.

Before entertaining the idea of meeting someone from online, in real life give yourself and the other person plenty of time to get to know each other as much as possible via written communication and telephone conversations. Remember that when you meet someone from online, all you know about them is what they are willing to share with you. Listen to what they tell you, listen for inconsistencies, and listen to what they do not say. It is what they don’t tell you that can hurt you.

It is my personal, and strong belief, that any dominant, or submissive who has nothing to hide will be forthcoming with information you will need to check them out well prior to the meeting. This will allow you to feel more comfortable when you finally do come face to face. Most would want it no other way. If they protest, perhaps you should consider this a red flag and reconsider meeting them.

A special note to submissives is warranted here. If you ask the Dominant for personal information and he is evasive, run for your life. Information such as a real name, a verifiable address and phone number, are essential for your safety. Do not let anyone take you on a guilt trip claiming that this is not very trusting and therefore not submissive of you. If he is not willing to provide for your safety, and peace of mind, you should question his dominance, and his intent.

Information you should obtain prior to meeting should include:

-Real full name

-Verifiable Home address, and phone number

-A detailed physical description, and picture

-Employer, and verify employment with the personnel department of his company.

-Make and model and description of their vehicle (if they will be using it to travel to the meeting)

You will need to find someone you trust to act as your safe call. This person will need to take his or her obligation seriously. This individual will act as your safety net should something go wrong. This is the person you will entrust with any information on your meeting. Information you will need to pass on to the person who is acting as your safe call:

-Your full name, address, phone number, make and model of your car (if you will be using it to transport you to and from your meeting place.)

-All information you have on the person you are meeting including pictures, home address, and phone numbers.

- Detailed flight information, rental car information, hotel name and phone number, and room number as soon as you know it if applicable.

-You need to inform your safe call of the amount of time you will spend with the person, the name and location of your meeting places including addresses and phone numbers.

-Phone number of local police.

-If there is a play session planned your safe call will also need to know this.

-There should be regularly scheduled calls planned to inform your safe call as to your well being throughout the time you spend with the person you are meeting