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 All Forums BDSM Talk and Support Yes Ma'am confused........ |  Login to Reply New Topic |  Printer Friendly |
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| deadboysdontlie | Posted: 2009-06-23 16:52 | |
Forum Apprentice Ireland 387 Posts | fuck this aint easy, but here goes;- ive always believed i am a bottom, ive often had guys in bars gravitate towards me believing they had found themselves a young dom and ive always found that irritating as i have little interest in the steriotypical dom-sub relationship. ive always enjoyed being dominated by a dominant aggresive sadistic experienced older male 35-55 and for a while that has been oh so delectable........ but;- recently my fantastys have been alternating and i have also been fantasising about torturing and abusing a male of a different type; younger 25-35, too pretty, handsome, defiant, arrogant and masochistic. what the fuck! am i a switch! i feel confused and unsure of myself... the urge toward love, pushed to its limit! is an urge toward death. (Marquis de Sade 1740-1814) is geal leis an bhfiach dubh a ghearrcach fein | |
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| tied2it | Posted: 2009-06-23 17:15 | |
Forum Apprentice Canada 440 Posts | Don't worry about the labels and go where your desires take you. Maybe your a switch,dom ,sub ...who cares as long as your doing what suits you. In many ways it is good to see both sides of the whip so at the least you will gain some knowlege and no doubt a bit of fun. All that said the world can always use a few more dominant women.  | |
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| Louloupe | Posted: 2009-06-23 17:37 | |
Forum Maniac United States 23,453 Posts | So you're attracted to more than one age group. Good luck getting them to stay in your fantasy, age-appropriate roles. Other than that, what's the problem? Edited by - MistressMiranda on 2009-06-23 18:09:28 | |
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| deadboysdontlie | Posted: 2009-06-23 18:17 | |
Forum Apprentice Ireland 387 Posts | MistressMiranda: So you're attracted to more than one age group. Good luck getting them to stay in your fantasy roles. Other than that, what's the problem? age isnt the problem! im struggling to understand/comprehend if i am a switch or not! if i am it means i have to look beyond my own limits and learn to understand other peoples limits/boundarys, this is all new to me! xxx -- the urge toward love, pushed to its limit! is an urge toward death. (Marquis de Sade 1740-1814) is geal leis an bhfiach dubh a ghearrcach fein | |
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| Devilish_Cherry | Posted: 2009-06-23 18:24 | |
The X-Box Widow United States 521 Posts | deadboysdontlie: age isnt the problem! im struggling to understand/comprehend if i am a switch or not! if i am it means i have to look beyond my own limits and learn to understand other peoples limits/boundarys, this is all new to me!
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| Jinxalicious | Posted: 2009-06-23 18:32 | |
*~*Jinx*~* United States 257 Posts | I wouldn't worry about it. If you're curious, give it a shot. Sometimes a recent fantasy isn't anything more than a passing interest. The only way to know is to try it out and see how you feel during and after. Think of it as an opportunity ~Jinx --- “If you believe in peace, act peacefully; if you believe in love, act lovingly; if you believe every which way, then act every which way…” ~ Tom Robbins "You can kiss a fool, you can let a fool kiss you, but never let a kiss fool you" ~ Anonymous | |
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| wanderingcelt | Posted: 2009-06-25 00:24 | |
Forum Apprentice United States 351 Posts | It's up to you what you do about your fantasies and it's up to you what you call yourself. You can surely continue calling yourself a bottom. Particularly until you get some experience topping and decide you want to carry on. At which point you can call yourself whatever feels comfortable. Go on calling yourself a bottom; call yourself a bottom who tops boys; call yourself the Queen Mother. It may confuse people, but that too is up to you. | |
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| Abductor | Posted: 2009-06-25 09:05 | |
Forum Maniac United States 3,216 Posts | I think this is a journey. You start out with some small set of kinks and as you go along your tastes expand and change. I think most people are surprised by what they eventually become. | |
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| JerseyGirl | Posted: 2009-06-25 09:05 | |
AVC Mod & Curious' United States 196 Posts | Honestly... why worry about a label... isn't the idea to just find a more fun way to get off if you're fantasizing about topping... try it... theres a lot more to it than most subs think.... its like work! hahaha at least thats what i first thought when i tried it... But it's fun to turn the tables and it can bring you closer if you are looking for a long term mate... its something about having someone allow you to see them THAT vulnerable I've questioned the switchiness myself... way before I met my fella (who I am currently switching with... mind you neither one of us carried the label switch until I changed mine recently)
Excuse me, I'm trying to find East..... Edited by - JerseyGirl on 2009-06-25 09:06:55 | |
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| Baronslair | Posted: 2009-06-25 15:10 | |
Forum Maniac  United States 6,657 Posts | deadboysdontlie: fuck this aint easy, but here goes;- ive always believed i am a bottom, ive often had guys in bars gravitate towards me believing they had found themselves a young dom and ive always found that irritating as i have little interest in the steriotypical dom-sub relationship. ive always enjoyed being dominated by a dominant aggresive sadistic experienced older male 35-55 and for a while that has been oh so delectable........ but;- recently my fantastys have been alternating and i have also been fantasising about torturing and abusing a male of a different type; younger 25-35, too pretty, handsome, defiant, arrogant and masochistic. what the fuck! am i a switch! i feel confused and unsure of myself... the urge toward love, pushed to its limit! is an urge toward death. (Marquis de Sade 1740-1814) is geal leis an bhfiach dubh a ghearrcach fein Since you've been here,I've always thought that you were miscast in the role as a bottom.You need to lead,not follow!. | |
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| deadboysdontlie | Posted: 2009-06-25 16:17 | |
Forum Apprentice Ireland 387 Posts | Baronslair: Since you've been here,I've always thought that you were miscast in the role as a bottom.You need to lead,not follow!. no-one told me! i was ambling along blissfully unaware! i think ive just discovered the other side of the coin,i am a masochist and sometimes being submissive is the only way i can relax and allow myself to be vulnerable im still exporing this side, its like an off switch for me as always there is a but! there is a serious sadistic side that i need to explore and i struggle to bring these impulses into line, until i can do that i will have to foregoe any experimentation in this area. -- the urge toward love, pushed to its limit! is an urge toward death. (Marquis de Sade 1740-1814) is geal leis an bhfiach dubh a ghearrcach fein Edited by - deadboysdontlie on 2009-06-25 16:22:44 | |
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| Baronslair | Posted: 2009-06-25 16:28 | |
Forum Maniac United States 6,657 Posts | deadboysdontlie: Baronslair: Since you've been here,I've always thought that you were miscast in the role as a bottom.You need to lead,not follow!. no-one told me! i was ambling along blissfully unaware! i think ive just discovered the other side of the coin,i am a masochist and sometimes being submissive is the only way i can relax and allow myself to be vulnerable im still exporing this side, its like an off switch for me as always there is a but! there is a serious sadistic side that i need to explore and i struggle to bring these impulses into line, until i can do that i will have to foregoe any experimentation in this area. -- the urge toward love, pushed to its limit! is an urge toward death. (Marquis de Sade 1740-1814) is geal leis an bhfiach dubh a ghearrcach fein Edited by - deadboysdontlie on 2009-06-25 16:22:44 I'm not telling you anything,do whatever you wish. | |
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| Karida | Posted: 2009-06-25 21:04 | |
Forum Initiate United States 8 Posts | You jsut need to follow what your gut tells you to. Labeling will only result in more frustration. See where the mood takes you. You could always bea top who has the script flipped suddenly. Who knows? I say just go with your inner instinct and enjoy yourself safely. Do not limit yourself by a label from fun exploration. I'm in the same boat always attracted to older dominant men with a sadistic side. Lately though I'm going back to my more dominant nature and enjoying that too. Go with teh flow, nothing tried, nothing gained, nothing lost. | |
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| varkalac | Posted: 2009-06-26 03:49 | |
Forum Maniac Costa Rica 19,042 Posts | Oh be quiet. Kitty has discovered she enjoys tormenting subbies under my direction. Just saying, who knows where this leads. The subbies all win. | |
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| Lepchur | Posted: 2009-06-27 10:08 | |
Forum Initiate Ireland 8 Posts | You're just curious. Give it a go and see if you enjoy it. You won't be hurting anyone by doing it. Oh. Wait... EDIT: Out of curiousity, have you ever heard of someone's personality changing every 7 or so years? Is that idle speculation on my part or is it plausible? Do tell. Ta. Edited by - Lepchur on 2009-06-27 10:11:40 | |
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| Mistress_Dez | Posted: 2009-06-28 01:30 | |
Forum Regular United States 879 Posts | You just might be a switch my dear. I was weirded out too when I realized I was actually sadistic. -- You either take it all or reverse roles. If You choose to reverse roles....You better be fucking good at it. | |
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